Why in the world this particular title for a blog would come to me in my sleep is beyond me. Honestly though, I had a dream the other night that I was blogging and one of my blog entry titles was “Chestnuts Roasting Over Mortar Fire” and it was on the topic of trying to bring the home front to the battlefield and the complications that lie therein. Essentially in my dream I was trying to figure out how to be a morale support to my son without being a distraction. This is new territory for me, so bear with me while I sort through my thoughts.
So what exactly is morale? What exactly is supportive to those who are deployed?
I have to ask these questions because I know that there is a fine line between telling my soldier how much he is loved and missed and becoming a burden to his heart and mind by fanning the flames of homesickness. This is not a question that I necessarily have an answer for mind you. I have more questions than I have information on the topic, so I would love any comments from any readers that will shed further light on the subject. This actually came up as a discussion on another board at which I post, and I guess I just haven’t come to any conclusions. I would imagine it is something that would depend on the family and the individual soldier.
The online dictionary defines morale as:
mo·rale
n. The state of the spirits of a person or group as exhibited by confidence, cheerfulness, discipline, and willingness to perform assigned tasks.
[French, morality, good conduct, from feminine of moral, moral, from Old French. See moral.]
SYNONYMS morale, esprit, esprit de corps. These nouns denote a spirit, as of dedication to a common goal, that unites a group: the high morale of the troops; the esprit of an orchestra; the esprit de corps of the swim team.
Online Dictionary Reference
Considering what this definition says and how that effects what the troops encounter on the battlefield I can only imagine why getting care packages, cards, letters and well wishes from home are so vital to the spirit of the Troops. I also have to wonder about the families left behind when it comes to the need for morale.
This is my first deployment as a parent, up close and personal and into a war zone. To be quite honest it has been much harder than I ever could have imagined. Not that I ever, for one moment, took my son’s pending deployment easily, but there was simply no way I could have prepared myself for the emotional roller coaster I have been on over the past several months. I swing wildly between imagining the feelings of joy I will have when he comes home, to the horror I feel when ever an “official” looking car drives any where near my home. Unknown phone numbers scare me to death now, and when I don’t hear from him I have to talk myself through the fact that this is just a normal and routine part of deployed life. I know he is busy and needs to focus on work… I am seriously not complaining at all, but I oscillate between being able to rationally think through situations and being overcome with irrational emotions. I wonder how we can keep our morale up here on the home front, so that we can be as effective as possible at sending our troops the morale they so desperately need and deserve.
Three ways I keep my morale up are staying away from the news, blogging and baking. First I have learned that staying away from the news is one big help, personally. That is easier said than done considering that the media finds it important to accentuate any and all negative things concerning the war. One case in point is the mere fact that we have not been hearing of all of these horrible civilian causalities lately. Have you noticed that it has not been reported every day that there are hundreds of Baghdad residents blown up on a daily basis any more? I can bet it is because the troops are busting their butts and things are beginning to make a change for the better in Baghdad. Will you ever see a headline that says “Troops do an awesome job curbing violence in Baghdad!”? No way. Instead they will put the death toll for the troops (although it is not as sexy since the numbers are lower and all) on the front page now. I have grown very cynical towards the media through this whole endeavor. I wasn’t a huge fan to begin with, and now I wouldn’t trust a reporter as far as I could throw him.
The second helpful thing for keeping my own morale going is blogging. I am actually enjoying giving it a whirl. I don’t expect to have a huge following or to have too many comments from time to time (although a new comment is almost as sweet as a spoon of Nutella, almost mind you!), but just being able to write it out and keep it as a sort of personal journal really helps. It can be very cathartic. If what I write ever encourages anyone else then that is wonderful. If it ticks them off then they can get their own blog and process their own feelings. I won’t get into a debate or argument about the feelings I have. They are mine, and I am the one walking this particular path.
The final item on my own morale building exercises is baking. I love to cook. I have a lot of friends and family who would even tell you that I am quite good at it. Sometimes I impress myself, but more often than not I find myself critiquing my own meals, menus and desserts so that I can do better on the next go around. How does this help my morale in the larger picture? Well, it is a hobby that I enjoy, but when I am having a particularly bad day or week I can bake up a storm and send it to Iraq! Yes. Baking and sending a package filled with a taste of home really does my heart good. As a matter of fact I know I owe my husband’s recruiter a nice plate full of cookies. The guys down at the station are super nice and have been a great source of encouragement. Also, if I am having a bad day and I did see a spot of news that leaves my blood boiling then mixing that dough by hand is good to get some of the frustration out.
Now onto more important matters — but matters I have not very many answers to, and that would be troop morale. I would imagine that figuring out what is helpful and supportive to those deployed would depend greatly on the individual soldier and his/her specific squad. I know that sometimes it is a good morale lifter to just send an extra box of goodies for someone to share with the others. It builds camaraderie and it may build the morale of a fellow soldier who maybe has not received any mail for a while. I have sent packages (one soldier was adopted by my Church and we got his care packages together) to adopted soldiers at Bagram, Camp Mike Spann, and in Tikrit. I have an address to send some packages to Mike in Baghdad, but I am waiting to hear from him. I don’t want the boxes sitting somewhere in the heat for weeks until he hits his FOB. So, I am anxiously awaiting and itching to send those boxes. In the meantime I need to get a quick box out to Tikrit. It is important to me that the men I send to there know they are being remembered, and that someone who has never met them cares enough to send them a package. They know all they have to do is send word if they have any special requests and I would do my best to get it sent to them ASAP.
The goal I see for when I am sending packages (whether to Mike or to another soldier) is simply to communicate that the home front is here, we have not forgotten them, and that they are important to us! I jokingly tell my husband “Rosie the Riveter riveted, and Claire the mom bakes cookies!” I feel like it is my own small sacrifice and offering toward the efforts. There isn’t much more I can do, in all honesty.
As far as what I put into the care packages I send… well again it depends on the soldier. If I get his name and address through an organization then the first box I send is used to establish contact. In that box I put a wide variety of goodies, puzzle books, writing materials, a letter and anything I may find that fits the box. I normally send one flat rate box to begin with, but once I have established contact then I may send up to 4 at a time depending on any requests the soldier has made. Normally they seem so grateful for all that they get, and they don’t normally ask for anything in particular. So, again sending the care packages is a really individualized process. I know it is a great tool for morale building, but there is simply no formula for what an individual soldier will need.
Letters are a nice touch too. You don’t have to know a fellow American personally to chat with him. I write a little bit about my family, about where I live and the weather here at home. I keep the letters light hearted and supportive. I don’t quote Murtha or Kerry in my letters, and I don’t ask the soldiers to tell me what is going on over there. I want to be a small respite for them. I want to offer them a small glimpse of gratefulness, kindness and maybe a soft spot for them after a long hard day.
My goal is to simply give. Their morale being boosted is my gift in return.
OK, I have typed enough for this particular entry. If you think I type to much you should hear how much I can talk when I am with my girlfriends! Oh boy. Another blog for another day. Until then, I will kindly remove myself from any soap box on which I may have hopped upon, and get busy with my laundry! God speed Mike, and God bless!
Tags: Morale, deployment, memorial, military by Claire
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