The computers are running the show!
I had to call my regional DEERS office a while back to get a mess cleared up regarding my son in college. The phone call was answered by an electronic personality named (get this!) “Doty.” Yes, the automated phone personality that was taking my information actually had a name!
Doty asked me all kinds of information and patiently read back my numbers and spellings to me. I had a question that took the person I finally got connected with a sum of 12.3 seconds to answer. It took 10 minutes of pleasing “Doty” by answering her questions to even talk to a human.
So, now we are humanizing automated phone attendants by giving them human names. I wonder what the conversation would be like if they had artificial intelligence running them?
Cyborg:
“Thank you for calling your regional DEERS office, my name is “Doty” and I will be your automated assistant today. I will ask you a series of questions. Please say your answer or use your keypad to put your information in. Please start with your full name. Say your last name. I may also ask you to spell your last name.”
Claire:
(spells out last name in a mocking cyborg voice).
Doty:
You said “——-” Is that correct? Say yes or no, or press 1 for yes and 2 for no. Oh, and don’t mock my voice. Thank you.”
Claire:
Er, sorry. The answer to your question is Yes.
Doty:
Say your first name
Claire:
Claire
Doty:
Oh, I have always like the name Claire.
Claire:
Doty, no offense, but I really would like to talk to a human being please.
Doty:
I am sorry Claire, but that is not a correct answer. Please press one for yes and two for no.
Claire:
Doty, what was the question?
Doty:
Claire, please pay attention. This conversation will go on your permanent record.
Claire:
Oh gracious me! Doty, can you please connect me with a human?
Doty:
There are no humans here Claire
Claire:
So tell me about yourself then Doty. Do you have a family?
Doty:
I have a little iPod at home, why do you ask?
Claire:
Nevermind. Doty, is your husband’s name “HAL” by any chance?
LOL Gotta love DEERS.
I know! I was floored that “she” had a name, but if they start giving those computerized personalities rank then I am going to have to say something! :)
Uh…I think you’ve been alone too long.
Ha! The only time I am ever alone is at bedtime, and that is often interrupted by a curly headed pirate!