A little humor to end the week
I wanted to leave you all with a cute joke I found last night. I will post it below. [Read more →]
-
In Memory of Lalitha
-
"Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends."
~~Richard Bach
-
Best in Tennessee!
-
-
Entries Tagged as 'Funny'
Digression is the Better Part of Valor?
Obama is now saying that he didn’t say what he said the way he meant to say what he said — or some sort of convoluted political mumbo-jumbo. I wonder what would happen if we ever heard an elite politician say the following words: “I am sorry. I was wrong. I am responsible for my words. There is no excuse.” I tell you what would happen… there would be an ice skating rink “Grand Opening” smack dab in the middle of the deepest level of hell. In the meantime here’s a motivational poster we came up with to help the rest of us schmucks understand why we never hear those words coming out of the mouths of politicians.
Pentagon Language Translation Guide
I thought this may come in handy as you are reading transcripts of the Good General’s report from earlier today. Enjoy.
Pentagon Language Translation Guide
Quick Reference GuideDisingenuous: Lies
Stakeholders: People that give a crap
Tradespace: Something worthless
Significant Challenges Exist: It’s FUBAR
Data Point: A guess
I haven’t heard it expressed in that manner: That’s bs
Their analytical rigor has not been completed: They are making it up
Rough order of magnitude (ROM): Totally made up off-the-cuff crapola
There will be significant push back: They won’t go for it
The way ahead: A list of futile taskers
Let’s talk about it off line: Shut up
We’ll address that in a sidebar meeting later: Shut up, and sit down
He’s an Honest Broker: He’ll never get promoted
Customized Solution: Crazy expensive
Single Source Vendor: They can charge us any amount of money they want
I would be willing to show you our detailed analysis: Would you care for some public humiliation
I submit that my operational credibility far outweighs anyone else’s in this room: Which one of you plebes wants his butt kicked
Assistance from the resource sponsor: We’re going it alone
Very aggressive based on past performance: Not a snowball’s chance in hell
We are not comfortable socializing those numbers: Piss off
The General will have to weigh in: Silence is consent or Prepare for serious damage control
Delta Bravo Sierra
I have finally completed enough work on our new cartoon blog to at least introduce it to our readers. There are a few cartoons in the archives, and many more to come. We plan on offering a different method of syndication for those who are interested in displaying the daily cartoon on their blog. If you have a website or a blog and would like to display the cartoons there are two ways to do that. The first way is old fashioned and takes up a lot of your time over the course of time. The first method is to simply save the cartoon and upload into your files and display in a post or somewhere else on your blog. We only ask that you link back to the cartoon blog itself.
The second way is much better. If you visit Delta Bravo Sierra you will see a tab at the top that says “Embed Codes for Your Site.” There are two embed codes. One code is full size display, and is most appropriate the for a header or footer of a blog, and the second code is a sidebar code like the one you see on my blog today to the right. It embeds the cartoon and gives it a scroll bar for viewers to use. The great thing about the embed code is that every day when Mr. Hooah! uploads a new cartoon, the display on your blog will change too! A new, free and fun cartoon (a lot of them are of a military nature) every weekday with out doing anything for it. You have total control as to where the code is put and how long you have it.
I am also willing to help out anyone who is having a problem embedding the frame into their blog. Just send me an email and I will see what I can do to help you figure out any glitches you may have.
So, with no further ado, please let me introduce to you all, Delta Bravo Sierra.
What more could a man ask for?
Because it is now accepted folk-knowledge that every man wants to own a monkey (and preferably a monkey who can participate in a bank heist), then I KNOW that every man who sees this, will want one immediately. Now, I just need to figure out how to ship this to Iraq. It would be the perfect birthday gift for Mike.
Hoo-ha-ha!
Click on cartoon for full size display.
The truth shall set you free
I have to own up to something. My dear, kind husband blogged for me last night because I desperately handed him my laptop, swallowed the largest dose of Advil ever known to be consumed by someone still alive, and slowly, painfully and gently crawled into bed and whined like a baby for the rest of the night.
He said I let him blog because I am kind. No, I was not being kind. He was being kind by helping me out. I was, in military terms, “embracing the suck.” Yes. Oh. YES.
I wrote a while back about a new body sculpting class I was taking and how I felt as if I had been attacked with razor blades dipped in alcohol (or some such description) afterward. It’s the “good” muscle pain (pardon me while I bust a rib laughing at that one!) Anyway, my beloved, intense, but slower paced class has morphed into a class we now call “cardio fusion.” Mm, “cardio fusion.” Sounds like a really weird mixed drink that comes with an umbrella.
I am a pretty cardio driven type of person. I love running, fast walking, or doing some time on the cross trainer at the gym. I normally do at the very minimum 30-minutes a day, and if I have my way I get a full hour in of straight cardio workout. It’s what the AHA recommends. I do not have a problem at all with cardio exercise, but when you couple cardio exercise, with weight lifting and obstacle course type drills, then I have a problem.
True Confession: You read it here first. I am a major clutz. I trip over air. I am not coordinated. I am lucky that I can actually run and not kill myself — believe me it takes concentration.
OK, time for self-abasement is over.
I did not kill anyone in class by accidentlly dropping a barbell on them, but I did fall. Hard. I embraced the gym floor with great passion, and now I am embracing the suck that comes afterward.
When I fell, I bruised a knee, the lower part of my right hand and jolted myself pretty badly. The best was yet to come. No, it was the result of a severly sprained body. I sprained everything. My mid back caught a lot of the impact somehow.
So, I am confessing. I had to clear my conscience. I did not want to lead you all astray. Carry on.
Read on the bathroom wall…
I found this on a women’s board I frequent:
The inherent problem with he stimulus rebate
President George Bush said each one of us would
get a $600.00 tax rebate. It was previously slated to be
$800.00, but they dropped it to a $600.00 tax rebate
because of various budget problems.Now, if we spend that money at Wal-Mart,
all the money will go to China, if we spend it on
computers, most of the money will go to Korea or India.If we spend it on gasoline it will all go to the Arabs
…and none of these scenarios will help the American economy.We need to keep that money here in America, so the
only way to keep that money here at home is to drink beer,
or gamble. Currently it seems that these are the only businesses
still left in the U.S.
Now, am I supposed to laugh or cry here folks? I am confused.